If you want to be a writer, cultivate your tenacity, give up your social life, be prepared to disappoint your loved ones, believe in the solidarity of the imagination and the soul, and remember that no one likes a complainer.

“Kane double-parks the Purity Supreme van and I can’t help but notice how conspicuous it is."

“Walmart making its own insulin, like, really gives me chills.”

“Make me cry. Make me cry. Make me cry.”

Like the rest of the human race, I harbor post-apocalyptic fantasies (naturally, I’d be one of the survivors, along with a few loved ones). I wouldn’t mind joining the new human society that comes together at the end of Margaret Atwood’s MaddAddam trilogy ^…

I was the assistant to a wedding coordinator. Once I escorted a bride with impacted wisdom teeth down the aisle. Another, I watched a young ring bearer lose his lunch right on top of the pillow with the ring.